Merry to Teary

Somewhere around pubescence, we have all seen dreams of falling in love and getting married to the love of our life – for girls it’s the reverie of a prince charming who will come on a white horse in his shining armour, grab her hand and ride off to a fairy tale land; Or the illusion and desire that at midnight you would lose a shoe destined to fall into the hands off a prince who would come looking for his lady love and once the shoe fits and you and him would live happily ever after. But reality is far from our delusions. Within seconds, all your dreams can get shattered. It is said that after adolescence, if one’s life is sufficiently interesting, the desire to tell oneself stories diminishes. This exactly is what happens in the real world!  

My prayers were answered. My feelings were reciprocated. We were captivated in love. Assuming nothing could go wrong, as we both buzzed from wealthy families, running the same business line, not having much of an age difference and of the same caste; we notified our families about our bond and plans to get married. My parents happily accepted my choices and wishes, but, unfortunately, and to my utter astonishment, his mother rejected me without even meeting me once.

As I mentioned before, sustaining love is not easy. Because of his mother’s headstrong disapproval, we began to quarrel and started to fall apart. I thought to myself, was our love so fragile that we couldn’t fight for it and instead started fighting with each other! It was a situation where it was him vs me, and not we vs the problem. Within months, we were from madly in love, to planning our happily ever after, to not tolerating to even see each other’s face.

Nothing helps a broken heart; not even a hot bath or a good night’s sleep. That was just the beginning of my whimsical to bottom out life which hit me like waves in the coming years. But one thing I learnt from this – You may be down in the dumps now, but take solace, in the fact that you’re definitely not the first one to have your heart broken in this world.

While my story continues with its ups and downs; a rollercoaster ride with a lot of thrill but also an unknown fear, my today is all together different than what it was more than a decade ago. This blog is not only a way for me to express my life in the simplest form as I can, but also to reach out to everyone and anyone who feels or believes all is lost. Believe me, nothing is lost. You are not alone. Hang in there and one day, you will see the sunshine. The prayers that were not answered were God’s way of protecting you and providing you with something better. Everything happens for a reason.

As I am writing this, Junior is fast asleep on the couch after jumping around all day. Once I am done for the day, I will hit the bed with Junior all cuddled up with me. Every single day I look forward to this. The warmth of his body, his soft fur and his loud snores. It feels like heaven. Nothing describes love in its purest form than a dog cuddled up with you. Oh well! He does occupy ¾th of the bed leaving little to almost no room for me to sleep. Not to forget the occasional toxic gas (just kidding) he passes sometimes from all the food he enjoys daily which believe me, I sometimes believe, is the only purpose and goal of life. But jokes apart, and honestly, I cannot live without any of this. I love coming home to him. A home filled with unconditional love, wet kisses, a super wagging tail and sparkling eyes. Yes! Junior is my home. My safe haven and the apple of my eye. I had heard about it that home can be another person. I believe it now. The person does not necessarily have to be a human!

The Prelude of Illusions!

Sustaining love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You must work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort and energy. We conclude that once we get the love of our life, it is going to last forever. This is where many of us go wrong, for happily ever after is usually only a figment of our imagination.

Year 2004, I was going to Sri Lanka for work. Little did I know that the trip would change my life forever. I was a Commerce Graduate, had just started her own business in the Travel Industry, and while most of my friends were struggling to find a decent job, or were getting married, I was not only euphoric, but also brandishing my overseas trip to every person I possibly could.  The business was out of passion, but of course predominantly because my father had the money to invest in my business. I was young, energetic, overconfident and snobbish, eager to swagger out to the world that I have started a travel business at such a young age.

I was introduced to a boy at the airport by my colleague, who was also travelling with us. My first impression of the boy was very mediocre. He was somewhat arrogant, a college graduate, and had recently joined his wealthy father’s well settled business. Work trips for him were just a way out to party all night and work was never really his primary agenda.

By the end of the trip we had exchanged phone numbers and little did we know that this was not the end. Soon, I started receiving forwards from him. Forwards turned to chatting, chatting turned to phone calls and phone calls turned to meeting. How did my impression for him change? I had slowly started to realize that I was moderately like him; a snob and an egoistic girl who had a rich father that provided the money and foundation to do something on my own. It didn’t take too long for me to realize that we were in fact mirroring each other. Nobody is perfect until you fall in love with them; and when you do start falling in love, all the negativity miraculously starts to vanish. You turn to overlook anything that you may possibly dislike about the other person and all you can see is the happy rainbow. All his traits I had initially disliked started to overwhelm me. All I knew was that I was falling in love with him and, I prayed that he felt the same as well. The only difference I had seen then was that this boy was a die-hard dog lover and I was petrified of dogs.

While the story of the past is for the future to tell, the today is as beautiful as it can possibly be.

I have had a great week as I fulfilled 2 major goals of my life. First being that I started this blog to share my experiences; this blog was my dream for many many many years and I am extremely content to finally get it kick started.  And second, I started something very close to my heart with someone. I know this second statement is extremely ambiguous, but the details will follow through soon enough.

My baby Junior is a little over 7 years old. His day begins and ends with me and only me, and I can say no differently about myself either. An extremely innocent soul, who is not only my lifeline, but has time and again, proven to be the one who holds me together. He knows me, he knows my moves, he knows the twinkle in my eyes, he knows the sadness in my soul and he can snap me out of any kind of bad mood that I am in faster than anything else in this world. Junior has taught me unconditional love, and believe me, once you have that in your life, things won’t really be too bad.  Dog is indeed God spelled backwards.  Me and my younger baby Junior have had a great week, as we not only enjoyed one of our mornings at the beach, but also a day out at a Doggie event held in the city, where he was showered with a lot of goodies.

Wishing all my readers a great day! Remember every day is a good day; There is always something to learn, care and celebrate!

Everything Happens For a Reason!

Does it ever seem like you have more adversity in your life than anyone else in this world? As if, everyone around you is having an easier time of things than you are? You begin to feel pitiable for yourself. The question, “Why does this stuff always only happen to ME?” constantly plays on your mind, and, you seem to believe that the entire world is conspiring, to not only be your enemy, but also to take away the last bit of happiness from your soul! Often, our life experiences can be so overwhelming that we become depressed by the burden of stress and anxiety.

Like ‘Henri Noumen’ has rightly said, “The real enemies of our life are the ‘ought’s’ and the ‘ifs.’ They pull us backward into the unalterable past and forward into the unpredictable future. But, real life takes place in the here and now”. To all those who are wondering why I have created this blog; this is not just the story off me, but the story of how unpredictable, complex, and yet eventful life can be. The title of the blog is self-explanatory, and yes I am a ‘Dog Mom’ and my fashion philosophy (today) is, if you’re not covered in dog hair, your life is empty!  But this was surely not the case a decade back.

It’s not easy to share one’s life experiences and yet make it interesting enough from anyone other than your own mother. Everyone has a unique perspective on life’s events. Everyone’s point of view differs as everyone has their own preconceived notions. But, Let me tell you this; I am just like one of you’ll and the story of my life and the events aren’t exactly too different from that of many others.

I lived in constant fear about things that will probably never happen. But this fear was derived from the events of my life which made me question and fear anything and everything no matter it is good or bad. Eventually, I have started to believe that fear is not only something that enjoys rent free space in your mind, but also, fear, many a times,  is meant to save us from further trouble which our subconscious mind invariably directs us towards when nothing in life seems to be going right. So, instead of worrying about what I cannot control, I have chosen to shift my energy to something that I can create. Sharing my story with the world is not going to be easy, sharing my views and my perspectives on life and its various events will be considered by some as rebellious. But, only after one steps outside their comfort zone, that they begin to change, grow, and transform!

I have learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, or end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Life is indeed a learning curve, and, as Buddha has said, as long as you feel pain, you are still alive. Things started to change almost 10 years ago. I was in the middle of a difficult time that was secretly a rebirth. The most unexpected series of events happened, which eventually turned out to be a blessing in disguise. Just when you think everything is lost or falling apart, it may actually be falling into place. The story of me which I will share with you through my blogs.

“The real you is not you, the real you is what is within you. What is behind your joy or your melancholy. What gives you the reason to ponder. What moves or stops you. What makes you you is you.”
― Ernest Agyemang Yeboah