Happiness can sometimes feel impossible, but it’s always within reach. Happiness isn’t something that just happens to you. But we create our own happiness. I spent most of my life believing that my happiness was in the hands of others, that if they were sad meant that I did not do enough. When in truth, I was doing far too much, it was just for the wrong people. In short, I was self-harming.
I also realized that no one is responsible for my happiness but me. I often thought, I do not look good enough to attract a life partner, or I do not earn enough money, or I do not have the confidence, etc. Think about all the people you have secretly had a crush on. All the people you have found attractive, but never said anything to. Every stranger you’ve temporarily fallen in love with on public transportation. All the people you have dreamt of and thought of it in the early mornings. And now take a moment to realize that you have been this person for so many people….and you have no idea.
It’s a mindset that holds you back from succeeding and believing in yourself. Humility is a healthy character trait to have, but if it’s at your own expense, it’s no longer beneficial.
You are going to realize it one day – that happiness was never about your job or your degree or about being in a relationship. Happiness was never about following in the footsteps of all of those who came before you; it was never about being like others. One day you are going to see it – that happiness was about the discovery, the hope, the listening to your heart and following it wherever it chose to go. Happiness was always about being kinder to yourself; it was always about embracing the person you were becoming. One day, you will understand that happiness was always about learning how to live with yourself, that your happiness was never in the hands of others. IT WAS ALWAYS ABOUT YOU, ALWAYS ABOUT YOU!
Many people realize that happiness is a choice and it’s up to them to intentionally choose it every single day on purpose. Happy people are not held hostage by their circumstances and they do not seek happiness in other people or possessions.
Oftentimes there are things beyond our control affecting our ability to “choose happiness.” And how we love and talk to ourselves when difficult (unhappy) times happen is a reflection of what we believe. During those times, maybe it is difficult to choose happiness, but then, choose patience and calm. You are given two choices at that time: either wait for the light at the end of the tunnel, or become the light to cross the tunnel.
If I could tell you one thing, it would be to love yourself whole even when you feel less than half.